Posted in Journal

Behind the scenes

Life Blog update… sort of: ‘cuz life update sounds much duller, haha.

Anyhow, by now people in the stormy fandom are under the weather of nobody knows giddiness, with the PV and single already floating around since the weekend, while i still have had to fork out time to finish Arafes 2013. I don’t like being rushed. I also think that watching live concert DVD Blu-ray is best enjoyed at one’s own pace, but it feels like i’ve been racing against time to keep up with all of these updates and back-to-back releases lest i keep getting spoiled here and there…

No, this isn’t about either yet. This is about this blog and i, my intermittent posts or lack thereof, the excuses, and other things, relatedness be damned.

My writing speed has slowed down tremendously lately. And by lately I mean months and months back, and it comes from me who used to write regularly. With ink, on paper. When it was still very manual and low-tech.  And I always managed to pen at least one page at a time. Lately, i write only weekly to fortnightly, and that’s mostly for what’s posted here. And it can take me days or even weeks to wrap-up a several-hundred-word write-up.

Well, I don’t think it has anything to do with blogstipation, it’s just, as cliché as it may sound: so little time so much to do. Not that I have that many things to do, but with work being physically and mentally exhausting and many internet/technology-related pastimes I’d rather do after hours, the last thing I wanna do is write. Writing takes effort, time, and a lot of thinking and at times work is excessively hectic and draining that my eyes refuse to stare at another screen for another minute.

I hate overtime work — ‘cuz it unapologetically cuts into my private time. It’s okay to work overtime once in a long while, but i’ve always aimed for work-life balance and preferred to keep them separate. Work is work, life is life. I don’t want to think about or be bothered by work-related stresses outside working hours. Work means money and money means bills get paid, but I don’t live to work. I need both but am never keen to pursue it relentlessly at any cost, at the expense of having little to no life, time to rest, relax, and enjoy life.

Let’s do the math: there are only 24 hours in a day. Deduct 7 hours of sleep, 9 for work alone, and 4 to get ready, commute, eat, and wash up,  i’m down to 4. Oh wait, what about daily chores? So i’m left with 3 precious hours for private and social life. If work takes even an hour (or two, sometimes three) of this time as well, I end up with zero me-time. And I still want to socialize, watch dramas/movies/shows, stalk other’s blogs, check social media updates and latest news – don’t wanna be called anti-social, do you? Plus that I’m following three currently airing dramas, my evenings are filled with drama-watching and recap/comments-reading, among other things. I just have no time to write/blog.

By now, I’ve put off or call off many possible entries. Been meaning to share my thoughts on Master’s Sun (and then Best Love, which I came around to resume and finish only early this year) but 5 months later I haven’t even started typing the first word — it’s all in my mind, hee. The same goes to several eateries, or frivolous topics like songs or performances, I’ve wanted to review. Since Shinigami-kun didn’t air last last week, I thought I would’ve used the extra hour to write a mid-series commentary – which of course didn’t materialize either. Or that bubble tea craze note that has been sitting on my draft folder for almost two months now. Sigh. Writing does take determination and require to keep distractions at bay.

Which shouldn’t be a problem, really, since I don’t write to blog anyway – despite the propensity to do so lately. This site is by and large a personal blog whose content can be rambly, ranty, or gushy depending on the topic and my opinion on it. That’s why i don’t promote or cross-post it. Neither do i have a set goal as to how often I’d update the blog, although a weekly post would definitely be nice. Still, I am not forcing myself to put up a half-assed post just to meet the goal.

If someone stumbles into my blog post and likes it – that’s good. If not, they (should) know where the close [x] button is. Simple~

_
A little backstory: I began posting my writing online as a backup, yunno in case of computer breakdown, system crash, or any other tech error and problem unfathomable and seemingly insoluble to us non-experts. Realizing that putting it up online would make it available to everyone, I employ self-censorship and apply multiple layers of edits to brush-up tone, clarity, and coherence before hitting the publish button. The end result is still an honest opinion of mine, though not as outspoken as it’d be if remained offline.

Donning a thinking cap, I pour a lot of thoughts into my writing, regardless of tone and disposition, and it does take a lot of time until I feel good about it. It’ll be up even later if I decided to include pictures in it. It’s time consuming indeed, tho’ not without benefits, and I get a sense of fulfillment and attainment seeing my brainchild online, so it’s all worth it I guess? 🙂

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I blog sometimes, gush ofttimes, snark all the time.

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