Posted in Movie, Review

[Film] My Blackberry Girlfriend — are you for real?

I stalled writing on Perahu Kertas 2 last month upon realizing that there’s nothing positive to say and tonnes to ramble about. Such a disappointing release I told myself not to ever again watch domestic movie adaptation based on best-selling book. I made similar pledge on Japanese melo-romance movie after finishing Hanamizuki only to get it broken by a step better tho’ still jaded Bokura ga Ita. And then My Blackberry Girlfriend came along… which, shame on me, broke the second pledge as if I already forgot the woeful plight inciting the origin of the resolution after only a month. I guess I need to be beaten down to pulp in order to really stop.

So yeah, MBG… what should I do with you? I cannot even properly gather my scattered thoughts and translate them into words that will make sense. I recognized MBG as a true story that went viral few years ago (receiving above a million hits if I remember correctly), then got published – the plot wasn’t ‘different’ enough for me to grab and own a copy of. As it turned out, it was then adapted into the big screen in 2011, and made it to our beloved TV screen.

It should start at 22:30, but there I was at 22:50 and the preceding soap opera that I never care to watch had yet to wrap up that day’s episode. This is what I hate about RCTI – their timetable is undependable; their live shows and soap operas go on and on with ill-defined running time, disregarding subsequent broadcasted programs. Shall I re-reiterate my odium for waiting and tardiness? RCTI should’ve known better that its series ALWAYS runs late by a wide margin, why still insisted on timing it at the impossible 22:30 slot? Talking about overpromise and underdeliver…

MBG tells a story of a guy named Martin (Fathir) who always experiences ill-luck with girls, to his bewilderment. Not to us. He overvalues his appeal. He’s no prince charming; he’s geeky, quirky, and weird. He gets himself a secondhand blackberry and receives a message from a stranger named Angel (Luna Maya).

The far from angelic girl he agrees to meet looks for a guy called Fendy (Keith Foo), former user of the bb, and accuses Martin to cover for him. The drunken gal soon passes out, not before vomiting into his shirt. Helpless, he takes her home and searches her wallet for address and then money for taxi fare. She takes a snap of him holding out money, calls him “thief”, and uses it to troll over him and order him around. If he refuses, she threatens to submit the photo to the police and gets him jailed. It’s super weak evidence, but the trepid Martin begrudgingly agrees. He shows up to her every ring, delivers her every order, and fulfills her every want.

This evil loop goes on and on and on until he cannot tolerate it anymore (finally!). He inquires into Fendy (two finallys!) whom he easily finds and confronts him to care for Angel. Fendy dismisses this, because he’s such a jerk. Angel also appears on the scene (how did she know?), seethes at his refusal to take responsibility of his doings, then storms off, only to get tripped by her heels and rolling down the stairs she falls (- -“). Oh, drama~

Angel’s true face, fragility and misfortune stir Martin’s heart (yeah, right). He does the incoming chores more happily, but Angel thinks he’s done enough for her. Believing everyone will only hurt her (why so sensitive?), she cuts ties with Martin and disappears (phew?)… only to be reunited again with him by whatever-you-call-it. The end.

So, I’ve written it all, from beginning to end, nothing’s left out. Nothing’s too spoilery about the story either as it’s so banal and predictable right? It doesn’t sound so bad, but wait till you see it for yourself – erm, if you haven’t, DON’T. By the time they first met, it reminded me so much of My Sassy Girl. The setup, characterization – the girl’s sass, the guy’s folly – and vibe matched almost to a tee. Down to the scene where the leads swap shoes. The difference is MSG still had heart and managed to tug your heartstring while MBG stopped at being ludicrous and managed to make you cringe.

Based on true story, it claimed, but nothing about MBG felt real. It’s all made-up, blown up, and overly dramatized. Nobody’s in the acting department was doing their part adequately. Every single scene was overacted. Except the closing scene. One doesn’t have to exaggerate to pull off an outré character, and one shouldn’t compromise or even sacrifice quality for whatever reason – MSG is one solid proof: both actors played their character convincingly. I’ve always thought that Fathir was a decent actor, but here… and Luna Maya, I’ve bashed you enough… Sigh. Is looks really that much more important than actbility?

What did they try to achieve with this movie? If it aimed to be a comedy, it was full of over-the-top silliness. Don’t tell me it’s a rom-com. Is this movie a joke? It even ridiculed constabulary that imprisonment based on pure accusation, inadequate proof, no witness and no trial is possible. Is law a joke to them too? What a mad world. Why those involved agreed to be part of this? Wasn’t there anybody on-site that said, “frankly, I don’t think it’s gonna work”?? Directors usually convey something through their work – be it a message, ideology, history, likes/dislikes, whatever it is. If not, it is enough of a treat as long as it’s enjoyable. “At least it’s entertaining” is feeble yet enough of an argument for me. But MBG… was flat out the worst* movie I’ve even seen. Ever.


Rating: couldn’t even put a rating on it.
Director: Findo Purwono HW
Production: Rapi Films, 2011
Cast: Fathir, Luna Maya, Keith Foo, Hardi Fadhillah
Genre: Comedy

_
*) Naming an utmost favorite is already difficult. Let alone a least favorite. I didn’t think I could ever name a title, but thanks to this movie, I got an answer.

Anyway, just curious, how did this movie do on cinemas? How many movie goers it’s able to lure in? Did anybody like it? If there’s anyone who likes it and can present and defend the good points of MBG, I’d like to hear from you.

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